Seven Daffodils

I know

May

Was a beast

 Beautiful

Terrible

Stronger than me

I suffered a miscarriage

The last days of April

The day

We got our marriage license 

I never mentioned

No hashtags

Three people

Knew I was pregnant 

Like days in a tomb

With no angel

For the stone 

I don’t know why

I don’t feel the need

To look for answers 

I know

It was devastating 

It devastates me 

Still

Different

Than the last

Broken candle 

No procedures 

No fanfare

I just laid in my bed

Bleeding

Until baby

Was no more

I  held

My sleeping 

Loretta

Tried

To cry 

Quietly

Grateful 

For the baby I was holding

My heart

Wrung itself dry

Drop by drop

For the one

Who was leaving

I could feel 

When it was done

I know

Many women

Have had it worse

I tried to think of them

But all I could think

Was 

“Please stay.”

“Please stay.”

“Please stay.”

The path 

I might have traveled

Quietly

Closed

Rushing by

Like a river

Disappearing 

Behind hungry thorns

Like Sleeping Beauty’s castle

I put my sorrow away

 Busied

With my pending nuptials 

Happiness and flowers 

Matchbooks

With our names

There have been

Insurmountable joys

Other 

Smaller sadnesses

More joy

My life

Is a wonder

Magnificent and meaningful 

My Love says

I am powerful 

My children

Beg for my hands 

My face

Still

Sometimes

In my dreams

In the dark

My world breaks open

I find that path

Race down it

 My heart

In my mouth

Towards tiny arms

Around my neck

An extra stocking

A table 

For a few more than five

A name

I only say

In dreams