The Princess and The Envelope
It’s been said
He moves in mysterious ways
Maybe canned peas aren’t that
Mysterious
I know one time
He sent me an envelope
When I really needed one
If you’ve never been
A really poor kid
You may not be able to fathom
The anxiety
Of having something
Really important to mail
And not being able to afford
The envelope
It may not be
Very magical
For you to hear the story
Of the time
As a young kid
I went to the post office
To mail something important
Without an envelope
To put it in
I just prayed the whole way there
That God would send me one
It may not mean much to you
To know
That when I arrived at the Post Office
At the end of my prayerful sojourn
A stamped envelope
Was laying on the counter
Left behind
By a previous customer
Like pennies
In the “take one” jar
I’ve never forgotten that moment
It was then
I knew
God exists
And He hears me
It’s the small things
That shout His name
The loudest
Recently
Our life has been great
So many gifts and blessings
So much to be grateful for
Recently
I have found myself
Running to catch up
To my own life
It can make you frustrated
An ailing parent
The general insanity that comes
With raising children
The current
Constant fear
Division
And brokenness
All throughout the world
Recently
Has added
To my breathless
Hands on my knees
Pursuit of a “normal”
That always seems
Two exits past me
Our homeschool group
Collects food
For the needy
I have been “the needy”
I know what it means
To be reliant
On the church food pantry
So
Even though I have felt
Like all my marbles
Went to live someplace else
I signed up
Bought the name brand
Did my best
While I was
Packing the bags to take
I felt a very insistent prompt
In my heart
I have felt it before
Learned
It is not to be ignored
The still small voice said
“Remember those fancy canned peas you have stored on the pantry shelf? The ones your family won’t eat, but you continue to buy and keep there because they remind you of your Grandmother?”
yes my nostalgia runs that deep
“Take those too.”
Insert
A moments hesitation
To wonder why God is talking to me
About peas
As I said
I have learned to listen
So I marched to the pantry
Carefully placed
Several cans of fancy peas
Into the bags
Headed to the church
When I arrived
The nice church lady
And I
Loaded the food into the coffers
As I was placing the bags
Onto the cold stainless table
I started
To explain
“Listen, I know peas weren’t on the list, but I felt compelled to bring them.
My grandmother always served this kind and I just thought… I don’t know…. maybe someone would enjoy…”
Here
I had to stop talking
As the rising knot in my throat
Threatened to choke me
My mind
Temporarily assaulted
By all the times
As a child
I had opened one of these boxes
Hoping for something
I really liked
By the times
I spent in joy
During the holidays
In my Yia Yia’s kitchen
Eating fancy peas
With lots of butter
Just a little salt
The nice church lady
Stared at me for a moment
Seemingly tongue tied herself
She said
With a small amount of wonder in her voice
“It’s amazing you brought these.
Just this morning a family called and requested peas.
Apparently it’s a family favorite.”
As my Grandmother used to say
You could have knocked my down with a feather
I blinked back
A few tears
Nodded to her
Croaked out some sort of response
She thanked me over and over
While I made my way back to my car
I’m honestly
Still
A little amazed
Maybe it’s foolish
Peas are common
It’s no big deal
Have I really typed the word
Peas
This many times
Maybe it’s coincidence
Though I’m learning
Those
Never really happen
Maybe it’s just
Wishful thinking
A happiness pocket
I need to fill
Or
Maybe
My Father knows
When I need to know
That He sees me
Maybe it means
There’s a little girl somewhere
Who will open a box
With her favorite inside
And to her
It will mean
That God exists
It will be a sweet memory
A belief in Providence
That will pass to her children
That will spare her
Some self inflicted
Ragged heart ache
Maybe
Just maybe
It will be her envelope