"Mother is the name for God..."

When I was a child

Whenever I was sick

My Mother would always make me

An egg sandwich

Plain white bread

Thickly laden with

Tangy

Sour

Creamy mayonnaise

Lots of salt and pepper

Some sort of scrambled eggs

Spattered with copious amounts of hot sauce

I’ve been sick this past week

And even at nearly 40

Whenever I’m sick

I miss my Mother

I miss that someone on earth 

Who always took care of me

The someone

Who in her last rounds of chemo

When she was walking with a cane

Climbed the steep staircase at my house 

To the second floor

Where I was laid up with a flu that would have put down a horse 

To bring me

An egg sandwich and some prayers

A cool rag for my forehead and a tacky stuffed animal

To sing me a song 

Till I fell asleep

The world feels different

When you lose that

Now

As my fever fights back

And my own daughters are finally sleeping

I make one for myself

While I think of her

Hear her voice

Like a Psalm

Bubbling butter in a cast iron skillet

Two eggs

Cracked and then stirred in the pan

Thin sliced white bread

Dukes

Salt 

Pepper

And Tabasco 

It gone before its cooled

Almost too hot to eat

After I drop the dish in the sink

I wander past my babies rooms

On my way to watch Netflix and pass the hell out

They are slumbering soundly

Precious lips

And lashes 

And limbs

They don’t really care for eggs yet

But maybe there will be 

Sandwiches of another kind

Prayers 

A bedraggled collection

Of wacky get well gifts

Sandwiches

And songs

Memories

And healing